"The little-known - indeed, buried - story of a Pantomime Princess's forbidden relationship with a Person of Shortness. The other Dwarves - Whiffy, Jakey, Junkey, Spikey, Fart and Stupid, - are conveniently out of the cabin (budget issues) when Snow-White unburdens herself to Chookie, the Seventh Dwarf. It turns out she is dreading having to be rescued by a Prince: from what she knows of Princes, they're spoilt brats who would make rubbish husbands. She is warming to the charms of the wee man, who loves to work - a relationship The Media have kept under wraps for decades - nay, centuries.

In the meantime, Dark Forces are Abroad. That's all you need to know - Dark Forces! Abroad!

Will Snow-White be rescued by a Handsome Prince? Killed by a Wicked Queen (is there any other kind?) or live happily ever after in a taboo relationship with the love of her life - who may or may not be a Person of Shortness?"

Snow White and the Seventh Dwarf was written by Dave Anderson and David MacLennan.